How do you find love in a world such as this – one where you’re probably crazy busy all the time, have a hard time trusting strangers and never seem to be able to meet anyone new? Well, you’re not likely to find your love without putting in the effort, despite any reservations you may have. Here are ten ways to align yourself and your life with your real intentions — finding true love that will last forever.
1. Don’t Delay
Life is too short to be lonely, and too many people hide away at home wishing they had somebody to share their life with. Whether you’re shy, busy or just plain pessimistic about finding true love, you know it’s never going to happen if you don’t try! That’s the surest way to fail, and obviously not going to make you happy. Put yourself out there, one way or another, now.
2. Set Realistic Goals For Your Love Life
Put real numbers to your goals, such as going on five dates a month or at least talking to one new prospective suitor every day. Who knows, that man on the elevator you see on your lunch break could be “the one”, but you’ll never know unless you talk to him. Sit down and think about how important it is to find your love — the person you were meant to be with — then come up with a mathematical formula to make it happen, and stick to it!
3. Stop Being So Busy
Dating takes time, not just for the get together itself, but shopping for it and getting yourself ready. If you’re always in a rush and can’t (or won’t) make time for yourself, you won’t have the confidence you need to start meeting people. Rewrite your schedule now to free up a few hours a week just for yourself. Once you hit the dating scene, you should be well prepared for all the pomp and circumstance.
4. Give Your Life A Makeover
While you’re waiting for that special someone to come into your life, get ready for him. For instance, balance your budget or join a gym and work off that extra weight you’ve been meaning to get rid of. Putting your life in order is also a confidence booster, and it will make you more appealing. If a man knows you’re independent and self-sufficient, he’s likely to be more attracted to you!
5. Know What You Want In A Partner
Experimental dating has surprise and excitement to it, but if you are serious about a long-term, substantial relationship, have a very clear idea of what you want from one. This doesn’t mean setting your sights on the perfect prince charming, it means knowing the characteristics and qualities in another being that will make you happy. If you love humor, consciously seek it out in the people you date; if you’re enthusiastic about the arts, suggest a date at the museum or opera. Don’t ever pretend to be enjoying anything simply because it’s what your date wants — go after your own happiness. Just being yourself is how to make him love you.
6. Get Over Past Relationships
Finding love again after you’ve been hurt feels treacherous at first, however, there’s really no other way to attain the personal happiness and gratification that comes with a real relationship. Your recovery begins with being honest with yourself, talking about the situation with others and even seeking the help of a counselor if needed. Whatever you must go through, healing from whatever happened in the past will be very worth the effort, and will enable you to move on and find somebody to love.
7. Ask Friends And Family For Their Opinions And Advice
Especially if you know happy couples who seem to be able to weather any kind of storm, talk to them. Ask how they met and what holds them together. They already know how to find true love and just might be able to help you do the same. Also, ask friends how you look, what your body language seems to say and how they think you might be able to present yourself better. This is not to imply that you’re not doing things right, just that there’s nearly always room for improvement, and what better way to accomplish that then through the opinions of people you trust?
8. Revamp Your Closet
You can’t find love if you cover yourself with over-sized sweats and your Aunt Beatrice’s hand-me-downs. Although it’s much easier than doing all the work it takes to make yourself really presentable, since you don’t want to attract a slob or give the impression that you don’t take pride in your appearance, add a few extra items to your closet. Things that emphasize your best qualities and make you feel awesome. For example, new boots can do wonders for how you look and carry yourself! Go second-hand if necessary; you don’t have to break the bank to look and feel like a million bucks.
9. Get Your Romantic Self Online!
Online encounters are a great way to make the transition back to dating, and it’s a medium that allows for shyness, apprehension, self-doubt and the impossible jitters many people get during the first face-to-face encounters. Use the Internet safely to mix and mingle, practice jokes, for interesting revelations about yourself and to overcome the inhibitions that might otherwise keep you from finding somebody to love.
10. Don’t Ever Settle
Even if it seems as if you can’t find love no matter how hard you try and put yourself out there, don’t accept someone into your life simply to avoid being alone. Settling can mean eventual unhappiness for both of you, and it may even open your life up to very compromising situations. You’ll be setting yourself up for failure no matter what the outcome, so keep believing that your true love is out there and that you will find each other. Experts warn that lowering expectations in love simply to have a love is self-damaging and self-limiting. In other words: You’re going to find yourself hurt and alone all over again, so do it the right way!
Few things in life compare to finding the love of your life. You’ve got to have a plan, make time for the process and open yourself to all kinds of possibilities. Make whatever changes are necessary in your life, so that the door to love is always open — sooner or later, he will walk through it!
