When it comes to finding a good man, many women give up because they think they lack the youth, beauty, intelligence, or sense of humor necessary to land a suitable mate. Learning how to find the right guy is not an insurmountable challenge, however, regardless of your age or relationship history.
Realize That You Are a Whole Person Without a Man By Your Side
If you do not know how to find Mr Right, you might need to look deeper into yourself before you cast a wide net in search of the perfect man. Women who are confident and comfortable with themselves have less trouble finding a guy than women who believe they need a man to survive.
Men are attracted to women who are comfortable in their own skin. While they do not mind taking care of their female partners, they desire a symbiotic relationship where both parties pull their own weight. If you think you need a boyfriend or husband so you can become a whole person, you might need to spend some time building your self-esteem and discovering who you are before you move to the next level in a relationship.
Focus on Men Who Share Your Interests, Hobbies, and Passions
You might have met Mr. Right already, but you didn’t realize it because you were looking in the wrong places. The best relationships are built upon a solid foundation of common interests, beliefs, values, and passions. If you are an avid birdwatcher, for example, you might find the right guy during a nature walk or birding expedition.
For most women, finding the right man requires an understanding of what makes her tick. Do you love movies or books? Can you recite the lyrics to every country song ever written? Are you passionate about your political or religious beliefs?
Churches, clubs, professional organizations, and other groups present social situations in which you might find the perfect partner. They create a safe, comfortable place to get to know men who might share your goals for the future and your favorite hobbies and pastimes.
Evaluate Your Standards on a Regular Basis
Every woman creates standards for potential partners based on her beliefs and values. You might, for example, refuse to date a guy who has never been employed for longer than six months at a time, or you might decide you will not date a man who lives with his parents.
As you get older, however, your standards should change and evolve. You might dismiss a man who did not meet your standards when you were 25, but who fits perfectly into your life as a 35-year-old woman.
Additionally, be careful of setting standards so high that no mortal man could ever meet them. While you should never “settle” on a man just because you fear being alone, you must also avoid overlooking men who fall short of your ideals, but could potentially make you happy.
Summon the Courage to Walk Away
This might seem counter-intuitive, but you might be struggling with how to find a good guy because you fear leaving a bad one. If you stay in an unhealthy or unfulfilling relationship, you close yourself off to better relationships.
Ending a relationship requires courage and strength, but it ultimately opens the door to future happiness. When you are saddled with a man who does not meet your needs, you cannot explore other possibilities.
Gab with Your Girlfriends
While you have no interest in dating them, your girlfriends are powerful resources in the search for finding true love. They meet men (such as friends of their significant others), but they will not know to introduce you unless they know you are hunting for the perfect partner.
Tell your girlfriends what you want in a relationship and a partner, then ask their advice during times of struggle. Your girlfriends know you better than anyone else in your life, and they might be able to point out a mistake you did not realize you were making.
They might have noticed behavior patterns, for example, that repel rather than attract good men. Armed with this knowledge, you can adjust your behavior so men know you are open to a relationship.
Learn to Read Signs of Interest in Men
While men are culturally obligated to “make the first move,” some men are uncomfortable with this social construct and resist taking the initiative. They might let you know of their interest in more subtle ways, such as going out of their way to talk to you or sending you a text just to ask how you are.
If you are struggling with how to find the right guy, pay attention to the words and body language of the men you meet. Do they give you more attention than anyone else? Do they hang on your every word? If so, they might be interested in getting to know you further, but afraid to let you know more overtly.
Relationships might be difficult, but you will never find out unless you find a man who will make a worthy partner. Use the tips above to make yourself available to good men and to take advantage of dating opportunities that come your way.